Well after the most wonderful and relaxing week on sandy beaches in Mexico, we flew home just in time to get home and hunker down before the snow hit. We turned up the furnace and made soup for lunch while the snow blew all day. With a difference of almost 60degrees I am very proud of my husband for bundling up and going out in the storm to look after his cows. Me and the kids, we stayed in our PJ’s ALL day.
Our week in Mexico was so relaxing and quiet and just what we both needed. We slept the first night for 15hrs straight… no word of a lie. We were celebrating our 10years of marriage, yet everywhere we went people asked and called us Honeymooners… So that was nice.
We were ready to come home on Sunday and see our kids, afterall it was our oldest daughters Birthday and she’s not so little anymore. And as happy as we were to see our kids, I couldn’t help but wish we were still back in Mexico, especially when I woke up the next morning to see knee high drifts in front of my garage, and blowing snow so we couldn’t see the end of the driveway. Sigh….. Mexico was so lush and Warm… I hate being cold, but more than that even though I feel rested and that my husband and I have connected again, I don’t really feel rejuvenated the way I had hoped. When the reality of house and kids and cooking and cleaning hit me Monday morning it sucked my energy and fogged my brain. Maybe it was just everything all at once, snow, cold,kids, house…. but I’m a little sad that I can’t put on my bikini and go sit at the beach for one more day. Oh well. The smiles and giggles of seeing our kids after a week warmed my heart, even if there has been a bit of crying and yelling too. And today the snow has stopped blowing and the trees look nice. I put on the Christmas music to put me in the mood and am cleaning the house so we can decorate. Christmas does have a way of rejuvenating me, there are many things about it I like, so that will be good to focus on. Since the kids are home because school has been cancelled for two days I thought today Christmas decorating should be fun, unfortunately the christmas tree is in a shed across the yard which is drifted thigh high… so the tree might have to wait.
It’s funny, when we were leaving Mexico all the resorts were decorating for Christmas in a very festive style, and I thought how strange it was to see fake trees decorated and Palm Trees with Christmas bells hanging from them with beaches in the back ground while the sun shines brightly. Christmas means snow to me, well I got snow didn’t I??? lol. Although I could do with out it being 30below.
Last week was wonderful in the sun and this week in the cold will be busy preparing for Christmas. Talk about Temperature changes…
The days grow shorter and the leaves are beautiful colors of orange, yellow and red. The Suns warmth is fading and I know winter is coming. Yet, the vibrant colors of the changing leaves, the bountiful harvest of the field, and the gracious gathering from the garden are all reasons to rejoice and be thankful.
So why is it then that my mood doesn’t reflect the vibrant trees? Why is it I resonate more with the tired grey grass and the wilted lilies? I feel a sadness as I morn the going of summer. I think I was meant to live somewhere warm… All year…seriously. Oh dear I already miss the touch if the warm sunshine.
I shouldn’t feel bad, for today was a perfect fall day. Warm by fall standards, no wind, the leaves crunching beneath my sons feet for the first time. A smile crosses my face. And yet I feel tired, unmotivated, bored, impatient like the evergreen trees waiting for the first snow to touch their branches and show off their true beauty. Yes I feel like I am waiting for something,
My fall color isn’t red or orange or yellow, it’s blue. I guess summer means so much more to me then I thought. So I’ve decided that’s it okay for me to be sad that fall is here, to be sad to see summer go. We need to morn for loss before we can move on. And I know summer will be back if only I can get through the winter. I will hold onto that thought but I hate waiting. I am not nearly as patient as I wish I was. But for my sake and the sake of my family I have to shake this mood. Like a fall tree dropping all its leaves on the ground. Bare, stripped away and ready to start anew. Yes that is what I need to do, let it all go and see the true joy of the colors of fall. That and take my vitamin D. (There’s a lot of truth to that too) : )
Well August is flying by and as I look at my calendar I see we are on the count down till school again. Boy that was really fast! But there is still at least two weeks left of summer, and so I know me and my kids are going to soak in as much sunshine as we can. Summer Sun I’m not ready for you to fade away yet. Winter in Alberta is too long. I really hope we don’t even get snow till Christmas.
But I’m not going to worry about that for at least another two weeks, because it’s still summer, Thank Goodness.
Well hello, I know it’s been quite a while since I’ve posted anything, but I’m happy to be writing today. I had taken a short break, because quite frankly, I couldn’t think of anything good to write about. The weather had me in a funk. But in the last week, spring has finally arrived, and the green grass I have been longing to see is here.
I never used to think the seasons could affect my mood, but after six months of winter in Alberta, I needed some sunshine to rejuvenate my soul. I needed warmer weather for the kids, so they could play outside, and finally it is here.
It’s funny how I understand now why my mom always talked about spring being like a re-birth. This spring I truly feel it. I feel refreshed, excited and eager. Ready to set some new goals and enjoy what is in store for me.
With the help of a friend ( or two) I am working towards running 5km in a few different fun runs. It is the start of something great, and training with a friend is the only way to go. Plus getting up and being physically active does wonders for your self-esteem. I feel better knowing I’m healthier. I’m also enjoying Zumba as it feeds my passion for dance and burns calories at the same time!
Another goal, that I see coming closer into view is my doula certification. I’m currently on call for a client with more this summer, and I hope when the summer is over I will have the experience I need to do the reports and send away my certification package. What a good feeling that would be.
All around there are lots of good feelings at our house. The cows have calves, the grass is green, my baby took his first steps, Deanna grows taller, Caitlin is getting more independent, and I can sit back and soak it all in, plus some much needed sunshine. Thank you spring for a fresh start.