Pieces of the Puzzle

What a wonderful start to my celebration of what I do.

World Doula Week is here and I’ve been a very busy little bee, “flying” from this place to another, sharing information about what a Doula is and how they can make a positive change in childbirth. I have been very pleased with the response from people and am hopeful that the interest will continue to grow so we can build a better birthing future for our own children by learning from our past. The power of women supporting women has so much strength.

I feel like a small piece of a puzzle that no-one quite knows what the beautiful picture will turn out to look like yet. Slowly pieces of the puzzle are falling into place and coming together to build something bigger. Each birth I attend I learn something new and my experience grows. I become a brighter and more colorful piece of the puzzle and want to learn more and more.

Being a Doula is a calling for me, and I’m recognizing that more and more as each birth comes. I see strengths in my past that I now can use to my full potential, understanding how my chameleon personality works perfectly into the role of a Doula. I can mold my services to the needs of my clients for bigger benefits to them, and it doesn’t feel like work. Rather it is a natural passion that fills me with joy and bliss,and like Joesph Campbell’s quote “Follow your bliss, and the universe will open doors where there were only walls”, I am looking for those doors to appear with hope and eagerness.

December Success

Christmas Eve, the day all the children wait for. Presents wrapped, cookies baked, gifts made and meals planned. Today we watch Christmas movies and snuggle on the couch waiting for tomorrow to arrive. Later  a supper with family close and  far and our Christmas is complete.

Surprisingly, I can say I’m ready for Christmas. After such a busy busy December I honestly don’t know how I did it all and have a cold (from which I lost my voice), and still feel ready and enjoy the day without rushing about. I even did a few last minute batches of fudge and cookies today. I managed to make 6 Christmas stockings, 5 teacher gifts, 2 grandma gifts, 7 arm knit scarfs, all the toy shopping and many many batches of cookies. Now to some of you this may be a normal year, but for me this was a big success. I have tried for many years to try and cut back Christmas buying with handmade gifts as I do have many skills if only I have the time. Well this year I MADE time and I’m very proud of what I’ve done. I think my husband is too.

But to me the real success of Christmas is sharing the spirit of Christmas with Friends and Family. The joy, laughter, giving, food and goodies and love of the season is the greatest gift of all. If you can manage to share in just a little bit of the spirit of Christmas then I think that’s the real success. We can get so caught up in the commercial part of Christmas that we forget what it’s really about. So this Christmas Eve take a moment to look around at the ones you love and share a smile, create a memory and enjoy the simple joys. Be thankful for what you have.

It’s been a very big learning year for me and this Christmas is so peaceful and pleasant, this year that is what I’m thankful for. I’ve given of myself and it fills me with peace. That is a big December success! I hope your Christmas is beautiful too, Merry Christmas everyone!

Fall colors

The days grow shorter and the leaves are beautiful colors of orange, yellow and red. The Suns warmth is fading and I know winter is coming. Yet, the vibrant colors of the changing leaves, the bountiful harvest of the field, and the gracious gathering from the garden are all reasons to rejoice and be thankful.
So why is it then that my mood doesn’t reflect the vibrant trees? Why is it I resonate more with the tired grey grass and the wilted lilies? I feel a sadness as I morn the going of summer. I think I was meant to live somewhere warm… All year…seriously. Oh dear I already miss the touch if the warm sunshine.
I shouldn’t feel bad, for today was a perfect fall day. Warm by fall standards, no wind, the leaves crunching beneath my sons feet for the first time. A smile crosses my face. And yet I feel tired, unmotivated, bored, impatient like the evergreen trees waiting for the first snow to touch their branches and show off their true beauty. Yes I feel like I am waiting for something,
My fall color isn’t red or orange or yellow, it’s blue. I guess summer means so much more to me then I thought. So I’ve decided that’s it okay for me to be sad that fall is here, to be sad to see summer go. We need to morn for loss before we can move on. And I know summer will be back if only I can get through the winter. I will hold onto that thought but I hate waiting. I am not nearly as patient as I wish I was. But for my sake and the sake of my family I have to shake this mood. Like a fall tree dropping all its leaves on the ground. Bare, stripped away and ready to start anew. Yes that is what I need to do, let it all go and see the true joy of the colors of fall. That and take my vitamin D. (There’s a lot of truth to that too) : )

School Bus

Well this morning I stood out at the end of the lane and watched the School Bus pull up to our drive, Gave my not so little girl a hug and she was on her way. Yes it is officially back to school. I have mixed feelings about this day because we have had such a fun summer and I’m sad to see it end, but also I am glad because we need routine again in our lives and the kids are at each others throats. As I type this Caitlin my younger daughter who is not in school full time is happily humming a tune and coloring pictures. Yes she is glad for a break from her sister. lol. She may not understand it yet, but I can tell she’s happier.

And as for my older daughter, she was both excited and nervous today as she waited for the bus. This year she has a male teacher and was already missing her Grade 1 & 2 teacher. But we managed to get through that and I think it will be okay. Yes this day is tough for both moms, dads, and the kids I think. But it’s also exciting too. I have many more mornings ahead of me like this one and I’m sure each of my children will handle it differently. There will be joys and challenges in all the school years to come.

Well here’s to the start of another new school year.  10 months of Lunches, outdoor clothes, agendas and homework. Back to school we go.

Big Thank you Hug.

I just want to take a moment to thank you for joining me this past week as I celebrated World Doula Week on my Blog. I hope you enjoyed my posts this week and I want to thank you for your support of my new role and my journey to being a Super-Doula. LOL. Sorry for the pun. I am just excited to be a Birth Doula and will continue to search for ways to make my services better and personalized. The joy that comes from seeing a mom and dad become parents for the first time is truly beautiful.

I am fortunate enough to have more then a few births coming up in the next few months, and I can’t wait to stand by each of them and offer words of support and encouragement or to simply hold their hand, no matter what time of day it is. Being a Doula isn’t a job for me, it’s a gift I’ve been given that I want to share. Every birth I attend is a privilege and I am humbled and honored to be a part of it.

I want to say a big thank you to my past clients and to my future clients, but there is one person who deserves the biggest thank you hug more then anyone else, for without him, I could not do any of this. As I write, I am brought to tears….. You see I have the most amazing husband, and with out HIS support, I could not do this at all. Thank you Dean for your loving care, your hours of childcare, your ears that are tired of hearing about all things baby, and still sending me out the door saying “don’t worry just go, Good luck and have fun. ”  Even though this journey for me is just beginning I feel his support stronger then any other, like we are on the same page and I truly don’t have to worry. This is where I am meant to be and he knows it to. Thank you so much! I love you Dean.

PS…. Dean you were my Doula, my support and my rock at each of my Births. Without you by my side I would not have been able to do it. You gave me strength and you believed in me. Every women should be so lucky.

XOXO

Re-blog of Renegade Mothering.

Here is a link to a wonderfully written blog that speaks of the powerful transformation that takes place when your first born arrives into this world. I don’t usually talk about topics like this, but this blog hit a home run for me.

Recently I came across a letter I had written to myself in early 2005. As I read it, silent tears ran down my face.  It was a reminder of a sad time, a time of mourning and loss, and yet I had been given so much.  But as I read my own words, my tears turned from sorrow to joy. How is it that just 8 years ago I was soo far away and now I have discovered a passion for birth; that I want to make a career out of helping other women make the beautiful transition into motherhood?? Wow I am truly blessed to have come so far. And I could not have done it without my husband. He was and still is my rock. He was always there and supported me as I transitioned into my role as a mother. And now I see the joy in his eyes as I pursue being a Doula. His support is strong.

Now I will probably never share my own letter, but this lady’s blog mimics my letter. She shared those things  most women hardly dare to think and it is wonderfully written. Thank you Renegade Mother, for sharing this with us. I believe all women should read this to know they are not alone, and it is okay to grieve for you loss in a time of great joy. Thank you so much. I feel like a part of me has healed even more after reading this.  Click on the link Below.

I became a mother, and died to live..

Renegade Mothering –  http://www.renegademothering.com

Christmas 2012

Well I finally feel like it’s  Christmas time. The Tree is up, the carols are playing in the background, Christmas gifts are being wrapped, and Family gatherings have begun. This past weekend we spent two wonderful days with family. Good food, good people,good news and great memories.

As I have gotten older, I really cherish that part of Christmas. The gathering’s, the family traditions, the giving. Yes, I really enjoy finding a great gift and giving more then receiving. I am in the process of trying to teach my eldest daughter just that. And I am also learning that giving does not mean spending lots of money. Sometimes a simple homemade gift or baking is just as nice, if not better, cause it was made with love.  Giving of our time is also a wonderful thing, like some of my family did last week. We helped sort Shoeboxes at the Wearhouse in Calgary for Samaritan’s Purse. Giving our time to this charity felt wonderful, it certainly helped put me in the Christmas mood.

This Christmas will be a first for our baby boy, so that’s always exciting. This year we get to share the joy with our growing family and Christmas with kids is very joyful. It’s the joy in their eyes I look forward to on Christmas morning. Being able to spend the day with my Family, just like I did with my own family as a kid,  means so much to me and this year is special again. I hope that I can pass on the importance of family to my own children.

Now I’ll admit that this time of year brings some stress too. Busy-ness, Sickness, Finances, End of the year just to name a few. Busy-nes; Trying to fit everything in, visiting and shopping, baking, decorating etc… can get a bit hectic. So trying to slow things down and enjoy the moments helps. This year for us seems more relaxed and I will enjoy that I think. It will allow us to think about what Christmas is really all about and try to bring that out more. Sickness; Winter is flu season, and our house has had it twice. It’s hard to get things done when you are tired and cant stop sneezing from that silly cold. My Poor Husband.  Finances; I don’t think I need to say much about this one, but that every year I try to spend less on gifts. Still it can be a stressful time on your bank account. End of Year; Christmas means the year is almost done, and a new one around the corner. Sometimes that is good, sometimes it is bad. I lately have been thinking about all the things that didn’t get done this year, and how nice it would be to do one more project before 2013 rolls around. Oh well, so instead I’ll focus on Christmas 2012. For the next two weeks, I’m going to go easy on my self, do what I can, and just enjoy what the season has to bring.  Family Dinners, visit’s with friends, parties and Christmas Concerts. It’s going to be a wonderful Christmas season.

Plus, I’ve perfected my crockpot yam recipe, and my mom has requested it for Family Christmas. That’s really neat. Boy I’ve come along way this year. Here’s to a Merry Christmas to everyone and to growth and Joy in 2013.  May God bless your home and your heart. From all of Us here at the Duquette house.